Until I die
by Logicaly Illogical
Summary: This is what happens when you leave your mate for no reason, and you guys are both depressed. NightClan Challenge #6 I STILL SUCK AT SUMMARIES!(does anybody offer summary lessons?)


Wildthunder gazed uncomfortably at her former mate's beseeching eyes. Amberstorm had loved her since they were 'paws, and they had become mates a few moons after Wildthunder became a warrior. "Please, Wildthunder! I am nothing without you, in fact, I'm less than nothing! After all we've been through together, please, don't end it now!" the dappled ginger tom begged, tears welling in his eyes. "Amberstorm," Wildthunder began gently, "Please try to understand why I must do this. I've tried to love you, trust me, no cat could've tried harder! But this doesn't feel right. I'd rather be honest and finish this now, unless you'd rather it end in heartbreak and betrayal later." Amberstorm stiffened at her words, "Don't you know of the heartbreak that I'm going through now?" he hissed, ginger flanks heaving, "Just because you aren't hurt doesn't mean that I'm fine! Just because you stopped feeling when-" he paused as he saw the fury in her eyes, "Don't you dare bring up Brightstream's death! This isn't about me not grieving for our 'love', I'm ShadowClan, you're ThunderClan!" Wildthunder snarled, " You know how we planned to be leaders together?" at Amberstorm's nod she continued, "What kind of a mouse-brain would name a traitor, who had a mate in another Clan, a deputy? Would you?" Wildthunder demanded. The question was left unanswered as both cats snapped their heads around to stare at the horizon as a line of milky pink sky shed cold dawn light over the forest. With a last cold glance at Amberstorm, Wildthunder turned tail and stalked back to camp.

Amberstorm lay quietly in his nest in the medicine den. The medicine cat apprentice, Featherspark, had discovered a small cave that could be reached easily through a tunnel in the medicine den, and Amberstorm had begun to spend most of his time here. He had told the old medicine cat, Jayfeather, about his mate's rejection, and the old tom had been surprisingly sympathetic. Jayfeather had told him that he knew how Amberstorm felt, and offered to give him regular herb treatments to take his pain away. the two toms had agrreed that it would appear suspicious if Amberstorm was always sleeping in the medicine den, so they had set up a nest in the cave that Featherspark had found. The dappled ginger tom lay there now, sleeping off the hangover that Jayfeather's treatments usually caused. The old gray tom decided to burn some sort of plant, which he would never tell Amberstorm the name of, and have the young ginger tom inhale the sweet smelling smoke. Though the treatments helped him drink his pain away, a little at a tim, but Amberstorm could never inhale enough to get her off his mind. Until the night...

A single berry sat on the floor next to Amberstorm. He winced at the sound of his claws scraping the stone ground. The tom watched his dappled ginger paw scratching words into the stone before him. Amberstorm had seen nearly three moons without his beloved Wildthunder, and the pain was unbearable. He knew that he could suffer no longer, and had planned the end carefully. Amberstorm stepped back to admire his claw work. It read, "_I will love her until I die_." and Amberstorm meant every word of it. Pain in his chest, which had started as a gentle ache deep in his heart, had grown intolerable. _I must end this now_, thought the dappled ginger tom. With that, Amberstorm turned solemnly to the bright red berry resting next to him. Amberstorm knew their tasty look was deceptive, for these berries could, and would, kill with a single bite. There was no hesitation in Amberstorm's movements as he leaned, almost dream-like, down to take the single, deadly bite. As he swallowed, a warm, tingly sensation spread through Amberstorm's body. His last thought was of a pale blue she-cat, her jet-black tiger stripes like leaf shadows in a shaft of moonlight, her shadowy black eyes shining with love as she gazed at him for the last time. He barely had time to regret her decision before he fell back into the warm, cradling paws of darkness forever.

it was two moons after Bramblestar's announcement of the tragic death of Amberstorm. The ThunderClan leader had said that he was found dead in the medicine den, with nothing more to suggest why he had died than a note engraved into the stone beside him that read, "I will love her until I die." Ever since then, Wildthunder had felt an unbearable pain, deep in her heart, because only she could've possibly done something to stop him. If only she hadn't left him! Wildthunder knew that she should've told Amberstorm that one of her Clanmates was threatening to tell Sparrowstar and have both Wildthunder and Amberstorm killed if they didn't stop, or some other clever little lie like that, anything to make it seem like she had to leave him.

Ever since Wildthunder learned of Amberstorm's death, she had been finding it hard to sleep, and her ribs could be seen clearly through her ragged pelt because she could barely choke down a single mouthful of food in a day. Pebblecloud, the new ShadowClan medicine cat who had only recently become the sole medicine cat after her mentor Littlecloud had slipped peacefully to the paws of StarClan in his sleep, had been giving Wildthunder poppy extract every night to help her sleep. The treatments helped Wildthunder drink her pain away, a little at a time. But she never could drink enough to get him off her mind. Until the night...

Wildthunder stood at the edge of the gorge, clutching the "necklace" that Amberstorm had made her for dear life. The necklace had meant more to her than Wildthunder could ever say, ever since Amberstorm had made for her, moons ago. It was made from little prey bones, strung together on a chain of braided clover stems. It was the last echo of her beloved mate that Wildthunder had. No matter what she had told Amberstorm, Wildthunder loved him more than life itself and wanted him to be with her until the very end. As she padded up to the edge of the cliff, memories of her time with Amberstorm flashed through her mind. Wildthunder drew a last, deep breath of the cold, night air, and leaped. As she watched the river grow closer and closer, her last thought came: A pair of warm amber eyes expressing endless love for her from the shelter of a round, dappled ginger face, its burnt orange ears catching the moonlight perfectly. When she hit the water, Wildthunder thought that she could catch a whiff of her mate's sweet scent as she allowed the water to cradle her in its warm, dark depths. The last thing she felt was a feeling of peace as the light vanished forever.


End file.
